Mark O'Gorman

"Don't look in to the light ...it's how they trick you into the rape game"

"Ask the server to touch your eyebrows.... And you will be escorted from the premises post haste"

"Don't walk in with your pants around your ankles... The staff don't care that there was a ghost in them and ya was just trying to get free"

"Make sure you have plenty a cash money fuckin place is robbary.... Least Dick turpin wore a mask when he robbed ya"

"Keep your underpants on while at this stop there is a lad... A lad who calls himself the wonderful warlock who likes to see bums and stick his penis into them while lickin tho shoes off passers by"

"Leave ya beard at the door and don't mention the war in there fire off some knuckle Childers who cares... I don't"