Pat Bohman

"You know I've got to represent for Dr. Switlick and the excellent, highly skilled women at Hand Therapy."

"Don't let the management decide that it is time to raise your rent "up to market value" without doing anything to change the value of the place."

"Is it worth driving across the Causeway for a Asada California Burrito? Yes."

"If one of your friends on Foursquare is "Askmen.com" maybe you should stop checking in at my Grandma's house and take a long hard look in the mirror."

"Don't eat the cat shit. It tastes a bit over ripe according to Jane."

"I just found a PVC tube sticking out of the ceiling over my shower. Occassionaly, a tiny stream of water comes out. Not really a tip. More like a freaky apartment feature confessional."